No Longer Abandoned or Lonely

My parents were emotionally abusive alcoholics. My father was the classic loudmouth drunk. When I was growing up, they used to leave me alone at home and go to a bar. I was so lonely and neglected, it wrecked something inside me. I acted out, and was suspended from elementary school in my hometown of Portland for fighting.

I always longed to be around people. I don’t know where I got the idea, but at age eight I talked a friend of mine into going to a church down the street. It wasn’t about God at that point. I just wanted company.

As I grew older, I became an overachiever. I wanted to be somebody. I became a logical, evidence-based kind of guy. I no longer thought about God. Where was he for me? I asked myself, What kind of God gives a kid the kind of childhood, the kind of parents I had?

In time I developed a successful company that manages timberland for investors. One evening when I was in my late 40s, my wife and I were at a dinner party, and this guy started talking about his faith in Jesus. I said religion was a crutch. He didn’t argue, he just invited me to come to his small group Bible study. I agreed for my own reasons: I still liked meeting people; and attending might be good networking for my business.

Over the course of two years of going back to that small group, I found myself warming to the idea of God. I even started attending church. The pastor said my flirtation with God was like falling in love, getting engaged, but never getting married. Then it happened. I was in an airplane home after a business trip, and suddenly I felt this tug on my heart that I needed to make it official. That I needed to come to God. Finally, all my arguments fell away and I asked Christ into my life, and he became the foundation of my faith.

I know now that God gave me the childhood he did so one day I could mentor vulnerable kids like I had been, which is what I’ve done with Friends of the Children since 1993. I know the lives those kids lead because I had been one. Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them” (Luke 18:16 NIV). We nurture and care for kids with the unconditional love of Christ.
— Duncan Campbell, 64, Portland, Oregon



The Power of One Small Group

Twice a year—Christmas Eve and Easter—Mom guilted me into going to church. I didn’t know God, and didn’t care to. I was a typical teenager. I wasn’t close to my step-dad and didn’t know my biological father. If a boy showed an interest in me, I wanted to be with him. It’s no surprise that at 17 I got pregnant.

My boyfriend told me to get an abortion and then dumped me. I was a cheerleader, a yearbook editor, and an honor roll student in a little town of about 3,000 people—Weed, California. But boy, did I fall from grace. My friends all dissed me. When you’re a kid, you think friends are so important. Fact is, I really meant nothing to them.

I was so ashamed, I dropped out of school. Then I learned what it meant to be alone. Boring. Horrible.

My mom started pushing me to go to a weekly Bible study with her at my grandma’s home. No way! I figured they’d pour on the guilt. Beat me up with the Bible.

But I was lonely and sick of staying home. So I finally gave in. I sat in my grandma’s recliner and kind of half dozed, half listened. But I kept going. Each time, the women asked about my doctor visits and felt my stomach. Slowly it dawned on me that they cared for me.

Photo: Robbie McLaren

Through their simple touch, an invisible God became visible to me. These women displayed God’s true heart to me. There was nothing dramatic. It was just these women reading the Bible and talking about Jesus. God had always been there. I just hadn’t been wise enough to see him.

Then one day, in 1989, I was at home, bored, watching a soap opera. It was 11 a.m. when I wrapped my arms around my big stomach and prayed: God, I’ve messed up big time. If you can do anything with my life, please do it. I give myself to you. I commit my life and my baby to you.

I hadn’t then read how Deuteronomy 7:12-13 promises what I was praying for: “If you pay attention to these laws and are careful to follow them, then the Lord your God will keep his covenant of love with you. … He will love you and bless you. … He will bless the fruit of your womb” (NIV).

For the first time in months I felt peace and hope. For so long my body had been filled with darkness. In that very moment, I felt as if a candle had been lit inside me. That light was an acknowledgment of God’s presence. I knew then that everything was going to be okay.
I joined that small Bible group. The women gave me a baby shower and led me into the church. They extended God’s hand of love to me. All I had to do was accept it. That’s the way it is with God. He is there, waiting, always loving, always forgiving.       
— Tricia Goyer, 37, Kalispell, Montana




A Gift on Christmas Eve

When my husband was sentenced to prison, he joined a Christian fellowship group led by people from the outside. One of the men who visited him belonged to a church near me in Brooklyn, New York. He reached out to me, too, but I pushed him away. I wanted zero to do with him or God.

One Christmas Eve, I had nothing for my kids—two boys, seven and four, and a daughter, eight. I’d sold everything to get drugs for myself. Then we heard a knock on the door. A deliveryman had a box. Inside were Christmas presents. That man’s fellowship group had bought toys for my children.

When I saw those beautiful gifts, I started weeping. I said to myself, Why do these people help a broken-down drug addict? That’s the first time I started thinking about God. I didn’t understand how he uses people to do his work here on earth.

I was desperate and demanding. Right there, with my children next to me, I prayed: “If you really are a God in heaven, then do a miracle. Not later, right now! I’m tired and my kids are in danger. I want a different life. God, I give myself to you.”

The next day I called the man from the fellowship group. He sent someone to take me to church. After the service, the pastor told me that Jesus Christ had died for me and that he would forgive me. All I had to do was accept that forgiveness and then ask Jesus to help me live a changed life. We prayed a simple prayer together and I knew my life had been washed clean.

Next, the church helped me get into vocational school. They sent a van every week to take me and the kids to church. They took me to visit my husband in prison. They sent my kids to Bible camp. They helped me stay clean from drugs. They opened their homes to me. When I was with these people, I felt God’s presence. God was there in the simple things, like when I’d bring my kids to church and find they’d made breakfast for us.

It’s been 20 years since my life began to change on a Christmas Eve. I didn’t come to God alone. I was led to him by people who showed me the way.
— Mayra Abreu, 53, New York City

Photo: Rob Howard

Giving Up Glamour for God

By the time I went to college, I’d turned my back on the idea of God.

After graduating from the University of West Florida I became a successful high-end fashion photographer and advertising producer, working for Christian Dior and Nautica, among others. It was like I’d won the lottery. I was living a fast, glamorous life.

Every once in a while, I had questions: Why me? Why did I get to develop this talent and creative side of myself and roll it into a successful business, while some other poor guy was stuck in a dead-end office job? Was something expected of me? I wouldn’t have put it that way then, but that was God knocking on my heart, keeping me uncomfortable. It’s not about how much you buy, or how many places you travel, that’s just stuff and aimlessness. I know now that God wanted me to hear him. But I refused. I kept going 900 miles per hour. Fast lane.

Then I collapsed under the pace. One night, while I was in bed, God visited me in the form of a deep impression on my soul: What do you want to do now? Do you want to keep going your way? Or do you want to try it my way? I told him I wouldn’t even know where to begin. Even though he’d allowed me every pleasure in the world, I saw that I had honored only myself, not him. I said I’d like to try it his way.

Then I fell asleep. I’d like to say I woke up the next morning and everything was rosy. It wasn’t. It was a process. That’s the way God works sometimes. Was it hard? Yes. But the relationship with him became easier as I spent time learning about Jesus Christ. He came to die for my sins so I wouldn’t have to. Learning to live a Christ-like life is something I’ll work on forever.

Life is about the journey. Everyone is either on a path toward God or away from God. My life now revolves around my relationship with Jesus. I abandoned a lucrative career in fashion to work on photography that shares God’s message with others.

God has shown me that the most enjoyable life is when you sacrifice your needs for others, as Jesus sacrificed for us. In the book of Malachi, God tells us to bring the money to the storehouse and he will open the floodgates of heaven to us. I started tithing of my time, talents and money, and I’ve been blessed in ways that go beyond money, time or talent. My life is rich and full because I gave it to Jesus.
— Michael Belk, 61, Santa Rosa, Florida



“I Was Eating Myself to Death”

I had been a Christian for a long time. I’d sit in the kitchen each day at 5:30 a.m. and read the Bible. I started doing this right after I was married in 1984, and I continued even after my children were born. It was my time with God, and it was good. But despite all that Bible time, I had been making something else the top priority in my life—food.

I had ballooned to 347 pounds. I was eating myself to death. So finally, one morning in 2001, I poured my guts out to God about my problem. “God,” I said, “I’m sorry. I can’t overcome this food addiction. I’ve tried my whole life. I don’t want food to be more important than you in my life.”

Of course, God already knew all of this. He just wants us to be honest with him. I told him I couldn’t change my heart, but he could. I asked him to give me the courage to do the hard work I needed to do to change my life.

Photos:
Michael Belk: John Loomis
Kim Benson: Rob Howard

Then the moment was over. I stood up refreshed in a way I hadn’t been for a long time. My relationship with Christ deepened. He knew where I was in my life, and he wanted me to release all the parts of my life, not just the ones I didn’t want to hold on to. But it took reaching out to him. That’s how God works. He desires us to come to him. He could have made a world of robots, but instead he gave us all free will. First Corinthians 10:13 says, “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it” (NIV).

There are a lot of important things in life. I love my husband, my kids, my friendships, and my motivational weightloss support business. But only one person can have the place of honor, and that’s God.

Four days after I asked God for the courage to curb my eating, my dad died. He was young, but had a massive heart attack. I was in so much grief that I didn’t care about weight loss. No one would have blamed me for quitting my diet. But God had changed my habits by changing my heart. From the morning I turned myself over to God eight years ago, I’ve lost 212 pounds. And kept it off.
— Kim Bensen, 46, Shelton, Connecticut



Finding Life’s Beauty

I was a tall, lanky girl with blond hair, and I became a popular model overseas. It was every girl’s dream. All the lights were on me. I was loved and appreciated for my appearance. But there was a price to be paid. When my looks began to fade after a few years, the fashion world began to not need me anymore. I was let go after a show in Milan, Italy—simply discarded at age 23.

There seemed to be churches on every corner in Milan. I had no concept of God, but I walked into a church, got down on my knees, and prayed to a God I wasn’t sure was real. “I need you,” I prayed. “I don’t know how to find you. I need you to show yourself to me.”

I went on to Germany, hoping to find work there, but wasn’t successful. I took a walk in the park, and contemplated my life. What should I do next? A man behind me was playing guitar. I turned to listen, and saw he had a box of books. He noticed, and pulled out a New Testament. He didn’t speak much English, and the New Testament was in German. But I held it and somehow felt peace in my soul.

A few days later—this was in January 1995—I went for a run in that same park, and saw this same guitar player with a group of people. They spoke broken English, but I could understand enough to know that they were inviting me to go to church with them. I decided to join them. The people at that church seemed to have so much joy and happiness. They found an English Bible for me. It was all worn and tattered, but I began reading it. And in doing that, I felt as if God had begun resuscitating my soul—and Jesus has been the focus of my life ever since.

My relationship with God has continued to deepen through joining a church and continuing to study my old, tattered Bible. A passage that now holds deep meaning for me is 1 Peter 3:3-4: “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight” (NIV).

God has shown me that beauty comes from within. After I gave up modeling, I went back to graduate school and became a high school and college English teacher in the North County area of San Diego. I saw so many girls who felt they had to measure up to culture’s standard of beauty. I was able to share my story with them and it has helped them not chase the wrong dreams.
— Jennifer Strickland, 36, Lake Arrowhead, California

Hearing the Word

I lost my eyesight at 17 due to severe cataracts. Suddenly about all I could do was listen to talking books. I had been curious about the Bible, but never read it before. So, I asked for the Bible on audio. When I put on the earphones, my journey in deepening my relationship with God began.

Since then, a passage of Scripture has stayed with me: “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. … And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him” (1 John 4:7-8, 16 NIV).

To love and accept life is to love and accept God and his Son, Jesus Christ. Challenges are life’s vaccines. They strengthen your soul. Since contracting severe juvenile rheumatoid arthritis at eleven months, I’ve faced many obstacles and challenges that have left numerous scars on my body. I am dependent on others for little daily things that other people are able to take for granted. What clothes am I wearing? Where is the glass of milk on the table? Is something to the right or left of me? These marks have made me a stronger person as I wait for the next mountain to scale.

With my limitations it would be easy to be bitter. But my love and understanding of God and Scripture makes anger impossible. They allow me to live and experience all that a life has to offer. As the Bible says, “It is necessary to pass through many troubles on our way into the kingdom of God” (Acts 14:22 HCSB).

God has opened the door for me to make a positive, spiritual difference in others’ lives—through my books, poetry, and motivational speaking. Christ can accomplish his divine plans through people, no matter how weak they are, as long as they are willing to be used. This brings out the faith in us and glorifies God at the same time. When I count on God to provide the best for me and others, I am strengthened. This is how I can overcome my blindness. I know whatever he does is in my best interest. So I continually remain a happy and grateful blind and physically disabled individual.

I am grateful to him for the life he has given me. I can still talk. I can still hear. I have all my other senses. I am still alive. I can enjoy so much this world has to offer. God is my life-giver; Jesus is my life-sustainer. When people think of me, I hope they say, “She is living proof of what God’s gifts can do in your life.”
— Shirley Cheng, 26, Wappingers Falls, New York

Photo: Rob Howard